community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I could fuck to npr.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize