dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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