i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
