is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize