Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
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