no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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