He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
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