I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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