I'm going to rape someone's good day.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
whose parrot is this?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
