I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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