I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
