That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
