i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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