We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
