It's Friday. Sex?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize