i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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