ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
