I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
