oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize