He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize