Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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