just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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