Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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