Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
