No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
She's the barista slut.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
