i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize