Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
