I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
