ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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