My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
