Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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