I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
