I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
