the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
