She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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