Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
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