Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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