Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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