I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
