why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize