There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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