Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
