She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
