I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
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She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
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Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
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