Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize