I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
