We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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