I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize