OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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