vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize